“Life is not the way it's supposed to be...It's the way it is... The way we cope with it, is what makes the difference.”

Friday, August 24, 2012

Just Beyond My Reach


It felt like I could touch it;
My future, being able to breathe…
In 10 minutes it was ripped from my grasp;
So hard for me to believe…

Years of being compliant
With appointments, treatments, tests
And dealing with the emotions
of my failing health….

Believing that there was a light
at the end of a long, dark road;
Looking towards this ray of hope,
to lighten this ominous load…

Decisions taken from me,
not a hint of impending doom…
Leaving my mind reeling,
Stumbling blinded in a darkened room…

Not sure how to face this;
It feels so out of control
But trying to look upwards
from the bottom of this deep, dark hole…

© Leanne Demers, 24th August,2012

Upside Down and Inside Out


On Monday, 20th August, 2012, our world was turned upside down and inside out – looking from the inside out, everything now seems topsy-turvy, and completely messed up.

Since April of this year I have been dragged through a multitude of tests as part of the double lung transplant process. Although attending all of these tests was time consuming, exhausting and frustrating, they were to lead to a positive outcome and life, not just existence.

With all my tests complete, I had begun to imagine what life would be like. After the initial pain of such a huge procedure, I began to picture my life and what I would be able to do when I could breathe normally…..

Spending time with the loves of my life; Jay and I venturing out into the big wide world, travelling, doing whatever we chose, without the thought which comes second to that – am I going to be well enough to do it today, will my pain stop me, how tired will I get? Spending time together, walking along the beach, running with Jersey and living life without restrictions.

Trips to America and interstate without needing oxygen…

With anticipation, I headed into the doctor’s room thinking that they would check off all the tests I had done and send me off to see the surgeons, who make the final decision on whether you are listed for transplant or not.

In a span of ten minutes, the rug was swept out from under both Jay and I, as we were told that I was not a good candidate for a double lung transplant, this would not be in my future, I had to return to my specialist hospital for ongoing care to keep me alive;  no new lungs for me because I had too many serious risk factors; previous melanoma’s, a teratoma, which is a benign type tumour, in one of my ovaries, CF related cultured bugs in my lungs which could return in transplanted, shiny new lungs.

We were both in a state of shock, my tears started almost immediately. Jay’s first reaction was to fight, throwing facts at the doctor to try to overturn his decision; anything to give me my hope back, to give us the light at the end of this long, dark tunnel we had been working towards for so long. Nothing worked; we left the doctor’s rooms, putting one foot in front of the other, but seemingly walking on air.

What do we do now, how do we handle this?

The week since Monday has been treacherous and longer than any week should be. We are trying to face reality but also exploring our options. Not only did the doctor take away my hope on Monday but he also swept away my usually present fight, my ability to face whatever tragedy is thrown in my direction, to sit with it for a while, but throw it back with a smile and say, “this cannot beat me.”

I feel completely alone and beaten; I had come to a point in my life with CF that all my fight seemed to be in vain as any treatment path I endeavoured upon made little difference to my overall health, I was just losing the battle. In flashing neon lights was this amazing chance, a medical miracle, so to speak, which would give me a chance to beat this tireless foe and give me a better quality of life.

This neon light was extinguished on Monday – this statement sounds ominous and sad and I hate that this negativity is even uttered by me.

I know I have a battle ahead, the fight of my life; I cannot predict the path this battle will take, I cannot imagine how difficult it will be, but even with the lack of resources I have, I know I will fight my battle until I can no longer.

My heart is shattered, my soul destroyed; with a click of someone’s fingers our lives have been completely changed, we are floundering in a sea of thoughts and emotions; Jay and I only surviving by clinging to each other and the other hands outstretched to us as we travel along the unknown.

We cannot predict the future but we do know what a CF future holds without transplant; I shake my head in disbelief and wonder how I knowingly face this imminent foe.

 © Leanne Demers, 24th August, 2012

Thursday, August 23, 2012

A beautiful friend posted this song link to my Facebook just after I had quoted that, 'united we would stand' as I faced possibly one of my hardest battles ever.

This song brings tears to my eyes but also fills me with a sense of hope that so many beautiful people are standing right beside me as I fight this. Without this support I do not know how I could even face it.

It still feels lonely, it still seems insurmountable but I shall call on the strength of my friends as we go into this battle together.

Thank you for being the armour that my body lacks....





Tuesday, August 21, 2012


As darkness descends, a darkness we could never have predicted, we face our biggest fight yet. To even fathom the fight ahead is exhausting, to feel that fighting may be in vain, but to know nothing other than fight is what may see us through this journey.

How do I step into this battle with so little energy? How do I fight when I feel like my hope has been shattered, dreams taken away, left floundering like a fish out of water. I can only draw on the strengths I have used all of my life and to rally the troops around me as I face this next battle - 'united we stand' is perhaps what I draw strength from; to know that I am not alone, whatever the outcome.

Some days I feel like giving up, sometimes it all seems too hard to even face but when determination greets me at every turn, it seems I cannot give up or give in anyway. I look upon a face that loves me through all the turmoil, friends who keep turning up at my door, a puppy that makes me laugh until my sides split and although I really don't know how to face this next mountain, I know I am not alone as I put one foot in front of the other and continue on....


© Leanne Demers 21st August, 2012

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Transplant Work-Up

Time has not been my own, days and weeks monopolised by doctors appointments and hospital visits for tests. The transplant journey is definitely not an easy one, you would be amazed at the amount of things they have to test before you are even considered for listing.

I personally need a double lung transplant as I suffer from Cystic Fibrosis. Years of chest infections have resulted in irreversible lung damage, the only option I have left to me is to have a double lung transplant.

It is a fearful journey, almost a year ago I lost one of my closest friends, she was only fourteen months out of transplant - we thought she would have plenty of years with her new lungs but she was robbed, hence the fear I am burdened with myself. I also know that many people have survived for many years with donated lungs, but I also know that this does not mean we are forever healthy. We still have Cystic Fibrosis, it does not just affect the lungs; being a multi-system disease, we still have issues, so it is not a cure.

The tests which need to be completed before I can be listed are invasive, time consuming and frustrating. These include; heart scans, sleep study, gastroenterology review and gastroscopy, blood tests for a plethora of diagnoses throughout and at the final stages for tissue type and cross matching, mammogram, pap smear, dermatology review to rule out any form of melanoma, pneumonia, flu, Hepatitis B vaccinations, Mantoux test for tuberculosis, Cat Scans, dental review, MRSA swabs. All of these performed while you are feeling completely unwell, exhausted from just breathing and getting through every day.

What awaits me now is another appointment with my transplant doctors; all tests will be examined and a decision will be made about whether I am ready for the next step, an appointment with the transplant surgeons, who are your last port of call before being listed.

My fear is indescribable but I know this is my only chance at life; to spend time living without being restricted. Negative thoughts just have to be replaced with a positive, and a belief that this will work for me and I will get to breathe again and live each day without thinking too much about it...


© Leanne Demers 19th August, 2012

Saturday, August 18, 2012

Faith and Fight



I have discovered, just recently, that I face many hurdles. With a faith in myself to be able to get through each one, I face this journey. Faith to see the positive, faith to see the negative and try to turn it into a positive; faith to know which hurdles I have to face alone and those which I will face with my circle of friends; to learn to acknowledge the difference and ask for help when I don't have the courage to face it on my own. Faith to know what I can change and what I cannot; courage to face what I cannot change and learn to live with that, learning which obstacles I have to take responsibility for and giving back the onus of many other obstacles to their owners.

What I face now does not compare with shopping lists, what clothes I might wear today, those who are or are not here to support me. What I face is my own mortality, staring down the barrel of a gun, wondering if it is loaded. I can face this loaded gun because there is an option, although scary, the only option left to me. The loaded gun I stare into is a soul destroying disease called Cystic Fibrosis, it is insidious, it is relentless but it also makes me who I am - it does not define me. I can continue to fight to live but my fight is pointless when Cystic Fibrosis makes me a prisoner in my own body; to comprehend that fine line when Cystic Fibrosis has become the definition of you, because it controls everything you can and cannot do. It can never take away a will to live, but it takes away most of what modern medicine can offer for any relief and makes a mockery of the effort you put in to win against such a formidable foe.

My story now changes as I face a new chapter in my life; without medical intervention, a double lung transplant, I can no longer fight to survive this disease. I have to realise that I have not failed myself. My dogged fight has brought me this far and although the next chapter is ominous, I believe it can bring me through the next chapter, as long as I continue to fight; as long as I replace negativity with positivity at every turn; take the hands which are outstretched to pick me up, to smile in the face of adversity and do what I have done best my entire life - to fight for something better, to fight for life because it is precious and should not be taken for granted. To know that I can do this, with the people who choose to take this journey with me, to forgive those who choose not to be a part of my journey because of their own fears, and to acknowledge that this has nothing to do with anything I failed to do.

To believe in the strength that has brought me through each hurdle I have faced, and to know when I cannot find that strength, others will find it for me and remind me of it.

Often I feel like this is a journey I have to face alone as most people cannot even begin to fathom it; the fear, the disappointment; I also know I have to have faith in the people who stand alongside me, with no knowledge of the path we travel but with a united front; to make sure I have all I need and more, in the form of love, words, support and an undying faith in my strength - that which, I often think fails me when I need it most.

© Leanne Demers 18th August, 2012